Humor & Everyday Life
5,195
FWC reported 5,195 invasive green iguanas removed during a two-day February 2026 special operation. That is not a typo. It is practically an EDM drop.
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South Florida Cold front Temperature drops And when the temperature drops Things start falling Green iguanas Cold-stunned Coming out of the trees The state opens A two-day operation And Florida Starts bringing them in How many Seven Seven That's the first load Twenty-three Eighty-seven Two hundred fourteen Three hundred sixty-two Five hundred More Six hundred More Eight hundred More Nine hundred More One thousand One thousand Five One Nine Five Five One Nine Five Cars keep coming More Trucks keep coming More Coolers More Boxes More Containers More Where are these things Coming from Florida Fifteen hundred More Two thousand More Twenty-five hundred More Three thousand More Thirty-five hundred More Four thousand More Forty-five hundred More How many more Are there You new here Forty-eight hundred Forty-nine hundred Five thousand Fifty-one hundred Fifty-one fifty Fifty-one ninety Five thousand One hundred Ninety-five Five thousand One hundred And ninety-five Yep Where the hell Were they all Five One Nine Five Five One Nine Five Florida Five One Nine Five Five thousand One hundred Ninety-one Five thousand One hundred Ninety-two Five thousand One hundred Ninety-three Five thousand One hundred Ninety-four That's it We're done I think we're done No No No no no no no Hey Got one more Five thousand One hundred Ninety-five Five One Nine Five Five One Nine Five Five One Nine Five South Florida How many Five One Nine Five How many came in Five-one-nine-five How many cold-stunned Five-one-nine-five Florida Five-one-nine-five One more time Five One Nine Five Five One Nine Five Five thousand One hundred Ninety-five In one Two-day Special operation Florida Five One Nine Five
Behind the story
Why This Song Exists
“5,195” exists because sometimes the official number is funnier than anything a songwriter could invent. In February 2026, an unusual South Florida cold event created a rare opportunity to remove large numbers of cold-stunned invasive green iguanas. FWC issued Executive Order 26-03 and temporarily allowed members of the public to collect live, cold-stunned green iguanas from the wild without a permit and bring them to designated FWC locations on February 1 and 2. When it was over, FWC announced the number: 5,195. Five thousand. One hundred. Ninety-five. That is the official operation total. It is NOT a claim that exactly 5,195 iguanas fell out of trees. It is not one neighborhood. It is not one truckload. And Florida did not somehow persuade 5,195 reptiles to line up politely and be counted. It is the number FWC reported removed during the special operation. Once I saw that number, I could hear the song before I could write it. 5,195 is not a number you whisper. It belongs on a giant festival screen with a bass drop underneath it. After eighteen songs involving toilets, highways, power outages, swimming pools, hunting trips, tacos, ceviche warnings and iguana pizza, Florida handed me an official government number that already sounded like a hook. At that point, the only responsible creative decision was bass.
Why This Sound
The story is about scale, so the number itself becomes the hook. Festival EDM makes 5-1-9-5 big enough to feel like a crowd event, while the dead-serious narration and enormous drops let the absurd official total carry the comedy.
- Collection
- Chicken of the Trees
- Sound
- Festival EDM
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